Once upon a time, there were two guarantees when getting a new job: a 401(k) and a work wife/hubby or bestie.
No one assigns you. There’s no official moment. One day, they are just there. The person who can help you translate your boss’s cryptic email, exchange eyerolls after annoying comments at the staff meeting, or share your emergency stash of M&M’s at 3 p.m.
But then 2026 happened and many of us work with colleagues we’ve only seen from the shoulders up on Zoom. So, I must ask, are work besties even a thing anymore? Or are they an outdated artifact of the pre-video conference culture?
{“blockType”:”mv-promo-block”,”data”:{“imageDesktopUrl”:”https:\/\/images.fastcompany.com\/image\/upload\/f_webp,q_auto,c_fit\/wp-cms-2\/2025\/11\/Girl-Li.png”,”imageMobileUrl”:”https:\/\/images.fastcompany.com\/image\/upload\/f_webp,q_auto,c_fit\/wp-cms-2\/2025\/11\/souter.png”,”eyebrow”:””,”headline”:”\u003Cstrong\u003ESubscribe to Girl, Listen: A Guide to What Really Matters\u003C\/strong\u003E”,”dek”:”Ericka dives into the heat of modern motherhood, challenging the notion that personal identity must be sacrificed at the altar of parenting.”,”subhed”:””,”description”:””,”ctaText”:”SIGN UP”,”ctaUrl”:”https:\/\/erickasouter.substack.com\/subscribe”,”theme”:{“bg”:”#f5f5f5″,”text”:”#000000″,”eyebrow”:”#9aa2aa”,”subhed”:”#ffffff”,”buttonBg”:”#000000″,”buttonHoverBg”:”#3b3f46″,”buttonText”:”#ffffff”},”imageDesktopId”:91457710,”imageMobileId”:91457711,”shareable”:false,”slug”:””,”wpCssClasses”:””}}
Why You Need a Work BFF
Science backs up the value of office besties. Research shows that employees with at least one close friend at work are happier, more engaged, and stay longer than employees who go it alone, according to the Gallup Employment Engagement Survey. That means, if you like who you work with, you’re more likely to show up fully present and keep showing up.
A work bestie can:
1. Help you survive tough days. When sh*t hits the fan with a meeting, presentation, or project, you have someone to commiserate with and vent to.
2. Provide psychological safety. It feels safer to take risks when you have someone cheering you on. You are more likely to propose the out-of-the-box idea, say what you really think, and bounce back from feedback.
3. Give you a reason to go into the office. If you’re like me, working from home means yoga pants and a decent blouse for video calls. Knowing that you will see friends at the office is sometimes the only reason to put on real clothes and appear in public.
And at time when there is an epidemic of loneliness around the world, workplace friendships can provide something many adults struggle to find elsewhere: everyday connection.
Why Work Buddies Are Tougher to Find These Days
1. Office culture. Employees come into the office three days one week, fully remote the next. Some teams operate in multiple time zones. Others hire contractors who work seasonal gigs of six months or less. Those lazy mid-afternoon conversations over Starbucks have been swapped out for biweekly Zoom catchups.
2. You can’t run into someone in the kitchenette on Microsoft Teams.
3. We’ve become too cautious. The Great Layoffs took their toll. Companies eliminated entire departments via Zoom. After years of instability, people no longer think of the office like a family. These days it’s “just a job.” And suddenly, investing in another person at work feels like a waste of time.
That said, workplace friendships that do exist have never been more complicated.
The Drawbacks No One Puts on LinkedIn
1. Power imbalances. Your glowing review feels pointless when your boss loves your buddy’s work more. Someone you considered a friend rejects your idea in a meeting and suddenly you question of they respect you at all. If one of you gets a raise or promotion, that may change the power dynamic.
2. Blurred boundaries. When you are close to a coworker, professional disagreements or tough feedback can feel personal.
3. Layoff trauma. Losing a job is hard but losing your person and your job is just brutal. And when a bestie leaves, it can destabilize the other’s life at work.
4. And then there are office cliques. Every workplace has them. It’s the group that lunches together every day, are always huddled up in one of their officers. Cliques aren’t necessarily malicious, but they can shape opportunity and the flow of information. If you are on the outside, you feel it.
What If You Can’t Find a Work Bestie?
Perhaps you work remotely every day. You’re the only parent in your office. You’re the newest member of the team. You work in customer service. Or maybe you just really like keeping your professional and personal lives separate. Perhaps the real question isn’t whether we need them. It’s whether we need to redefine them. Instead of one best friend, build a team:
- One person who gives candid career advice.
- One person who shares memes mid-meeting.
- One person who challenges the way you think.
- One person who understands our life outside of work.
- This ecosystem can be just as powerful and much less fragile.
So, Are they Still a Thing?
Yes. But they look different. They might live in your DMs instead of the cubicle next to you. They might work in another state. They might be someone you’ve only met in person twice but text during every staff Zoom. All are valid. The deeper issue isn’t whether you have a work bestie. It’s whether you feel seen where you spend most of your waking hours. And in a culture that asks us to fluctuate between hustle and detachment, maybe the real luxury isn’t flexibility or perks. It’s having someone who understands exactly what that long meeting was really about.
{“blockType”:”mv-promo-block”,”data”:{“imageDesktopUrl”:”https:\/\/images.fastcompany.com\/image\/upload\/f_webp,q_auto,c_fit\/wp-cms-2\/2025\/11\/Girl-Li.png”,”imageMobileUrl”:”https:\/\/images.fastcompany.com\/image\/upload\/f_webp,q_auto,c_fit\/wp-cms-2\/2025\/11\/souter.png”,”eyebrow”:””,”headline”:”\u003Cstrong\u003ESubscribe to Girl, Listen: A Guide to What Really Matters\u003C\/strong\u003E”,”dek”:”Ericka dives into the heat of modern motherhood, challenging the notion that personal identity must be sacrificed at the altar of parenting.”,”subhed”:””,”description”:””,”ctaText”:”SIGN UP”,”ctaUrl”:”https:\/\/erickasouter.substack.com\/subscribe”,”theme”:{“bg”:”#f5f5f5″,”text”:”#000000″,”eyebrow”:”#9aa2aa”,”subhed”:”#ffffff”,”buttonBg”:”#000000″,”buttonHoverBg”:”#3b3f46″,”buttonText”:”#ffffff”},”imageDesktopId”:91457710,”imageMobileId”:91457711,”shareable”:false,”slug”:””,”wpCssClasses”:””}}
